The Defining Decade by Meg Joy

  • “The unloved life is not worth examining"
  • xxv: “Uncertainty makes people anxious, and distraction is the twenty-first-century opiate of the masses."
  • Career

    • 2/3 of lifetime wage growth happens in first 10 years of a career (12)

    • “weak ties” are exceptionally important for our careers

    • If you want to get someone on your side, ask for a favor (from Ben Franklin autobiography) (29)

  • Love

    • the best time to work on your marriage is before you have on (80)

    • picking and creating our families is one of the most important set of decisions we will make, and much of this is decided in our twenties (88)

    • The Big Five personality traits - how important personality is in choosing who we marry



      • neuroticism (tense, moody, anxious, worries a lot, sees the negative) can be a relationship killer (Jordan?) (124)



    • “‘How do I know if a relationship is hard because it’s wrong or because it’s real?’ ‘You’ll never know with complete certainty. That’s why marriage is a commitment, not a guarantee.’” (127)

  • Brain and Body

    • “The art of being wise is knowing what to overlook.”-William James (15)